Tag Archives: oxygen

Her Diamonds – Hang in there, Mum.

CFS/ME is a nasty, nasty, horrible, nasty illness.

I have just spent the morning sitting on the floor of my mothers bedroom while she lay collapsed, semi-conscious and unable to move on the bed.

I had hooked her up to oxygen, taken her blood pressure, given her heat packs, fed her meds. Yet nothing can pull her out of these horrible dizzying and painful collapses except time…she must simply suffer and wait them out.

And yet they keep coming, regularly at the moment, and every slight change in her treatment seems to trigger another.

And yet she never complains. She just lies there apologising (when she can talk). She even apologised to the ambos once.

Such a kind, selfless, brave soul.

So for her:

And I don’t know what I’m supposed to do
But if she feels bad then I do too
So I let her be

And she says ooh I can’t take no more
Her tears like diamonds on the floor
And her diamonds bring me down
Cause I can’t help her now

She’s down in it
She tried her best but now she can’t win
It’s hard to see them on the ground
Her diamonds falling down, way down

And I don’t know what I’m supposed to do
So I sit down and I cry too
But don’t let her see

I can’t take these diamonds falling down

Rob Thomas – Her Diamonds (written for his ill wife)

I hope they figure out this stupid CFS/ME thing properly soon.

new treatment. scary. exciting.

I try not to talk about being sick too much ‘cos it’s a drag to hear about all the time. Even I get sick of hearing about it.

But the fact is ill health is having a very significant impact (negatively…) on my life at the moment (I mean how many people have to use oxygen while they do their assigments? makes me feel like a little old person).

But this is exciting. I have officially started a new treatment to deal with my CFS/ME after seeing a specialist from Belgium.

It involves a truckload (and moneyload) of supplements and cycles of antibiotics.


  • …because apparently it has a good chance of making me worse before I get better…something to do with releasing nasty bacteria from cells and therefore increasing the load on my already under-functioning immune system.
  • …because there is no promise that this will work.
  • …because it involves having to inject myself daily. ew.

However, exciting:

  • …because it feels good to be doing something; to be giving myself a significant chance of fixing the root of all this chronic pain, nausea, exhaustion, constant flu like symptoms, and to dream of one day feeling like a normal person….

So far: have completed one week of this treatment. Have survived. However have had a dreadful weekend and have nearly fainted several times and managed to get very little study done. but hey at least it’s doing something. feeling positive.

3 weeks of semester left. just need to hang in there 3 weeks more…then 5 sweet weeks of holidays. apart from work. but still. yay!